When feeling stuck, we’re looking for answers, but we should be after better questions instead.

To get unstuck in life, ask better questions.

If you feel like you’re stuck in life, chances are, you are asking yourself questions but struggling to answer them.  

But what if you are not asking yourself the right questions in the first place?

“The quality of your life is a direct reflection of the quality of the questions you are asking yourself” ― Anthony Robbins, Awaken the Giant Within

I firmly believe that instead of focusing on finding the answers as soon as possible, it’s best to explore better questions. 

The way some questions are constructed will almost always lead you to loop thinking. They are not Forward Moving Questions.

The answers are inconclusive, or you may not have enough details to answer them correctly. 

Don’t be an ass

Have you heard the story of the Buridan’s ass (Asinus), or let’s just say: the equally hungry and thirsty donkey, struggling to choose between a pile of hay and a bucket of water. The ass, unable to choose between the two, dies of hunger.

The poor donkey was undoubtedly not asking himself the right questions. 

Instead of debating WHAT TO CHOOSE? he might have thought of WHY TO CHOOSE AT ALL? or DOES IT EVEN MATTER WHICH ONE YOU CHOOSE FIRST? or HOW CAN I MAKE A MORE INFORMED DECISION?

Forward Moving Questions 

There are many better questions you can ask yourself, and it’s a good idea to do so daily.

I would encourage you also to collect good questions and organize them into different categories (decision making, areas of life, etc.).

So what are the right questions to ask? It depends on the scenario, of course, but I often find following every ‘what’ question’ with a ‘why’ question.

It goes somewhat like this:

What do I want to do in life? And why?

What am I avoiding? And why?

What do I like? And why do I like it?

What do I value? And why?

Take-Home Message

Even if you don’t Start with Why, how Simon Sinek wants you to, then at least follow up with a WHY.

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